I’m all over the map today.
Should be a very happy day but today, not so much. People keep driving me down. Had one friend “hang up” on me in IM because she thought I was being a downer. Well, I wasn’t down until she accused me of it and then disconnected. Had another tell me that people think I’m out to get them.
Suppose I should take it all as a sign that I need a break from those places where people are having that kind of an effect on me. I have a lot I have to do over the next little while anyway so the fewer distractions the better, I suppose. Doesn’t stop the sudden crying jags, though.
It’s interesting that my Cainer horoscope for the weekend says:
“Some obstacles exist to guide us from an ill-chosen path. Others are ‘challenges’ to test our determination. We can get round them if we are willing to try hard enough, long enough. The big question is, into which of these two categories does your current difficulty fall? The answer is: whichever you most want it to. Here comes the chance to create big change. If you’re looking for a way out, here it is on a plate. If you are not, well… all you have to do now is… carry on.”
One of the biggest sources of my mood swings today falls into that category. I haven’t decided yet what I will ultimately do about it. Big change is tempting but I’m not sure if I’m actually looking for a way out or just a break. So I’ve opted, for now at least, for a forced vacation. (I’ve blocked access to the site in question in my hosts file.)
And his forecast for the week ahead says:
“By nature, you are a deep, sensitive person. This does not mean that you have to respond to everything you feel, or that you need to fully explore everything you think. You have a right to relax, a right to ignore what you don’t want to get too involved with, and a right to put your sensitivity on hold, especially when you suspect it is being taken advantage of. If or when it becomes truly important to pay attention to what your heart is telling you, the urge will become irresistible. Till then, allow yourself to relax. What’s seemingly a big issue this week is really only a small one. “
Very similar to the weekend one, isn’t it. And also very relevant to that same situation. It appears I gots me some thinkin’ to do.
Life Begins at 41...or maybe 43 