How surreal

My mother died over an hour ago.

I found out about via my niece’s Facebook post.

My mother would have appreciated the humour in that. I’m sure I’ll find it more funny another day. But not so much right now. Right now I’m fighting off the scary scaries and wondering why no one has called me yet to tell me. (The logical part of me understands that there are more pressing matters for whoever was still on deathwatch with my father to attend to — taking care of their own grief, saying their own goodbyes, making arrangements — or maybe they were waiting for daylight, but my mother’s baby girl doesn’t understand why she’s grieving alone right now.)

[Edited to add an hour later: Dad couldn’t sleep so he called me. We had a good conversation — and a laugh about the Facebook announcement.]

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5 thoughts on “How surreal

  1. I’m so sorry to hear about your mother, and that you found out like that. it’s a bit fucked up. I guess people react strangely and heads aren’t always rational under duress. If you are still waiting for the call. get on the phone to someone PRONTO! and go grieve in company.

    • Thanks for that, Angelica. No, I’m not still waiting. My Dad was apparently planning on waiting until daylight to call me to tell me (my siblings all live in the same city as my parents, while I live in a different province completely), not thinking that it’s the kind of news you should get when it happens (or that I was most likely awake anyway). He felt really bad that I found out from Facebook, but, yes, it was a bit fucked up. Very black humour-y, though. (I think I horrified my niece a little when I commented that it was a very weird way to find out in a comment on the Facebook post — she ended up taking both down very quickly. Makes me feel a little better. LOL)

  2. As a funny addendum, the morning my father died, that same niece posted an RIP for him on her Facebook — before we’d had a chance to notify everyone (uncles, cousins, etc.) who needed notifying. She took it down quickly, but not before my sister-in-law got a notification alert.

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