Mad songwriting skillz

When I was, oh, 10 or 11, my sister and I were an endless font of creative energy. We created stage shows, for which we printed tickets and offered door prizes. We also did a mean Sonny and Cher impression (I usually ended up being Sonny, for some reason), put on some really groovy organ recitals, and just shared our light with anyone who didn’t get away fast enough. (Tip: Never have “Teddy Bears Picnic” singalongs in listening reach of your choir conductor aunt or you’ll be conscripted faster than you can scream “Mommy! Help me!!!”)

More importantly, we wrote songs. One particularly profound duet went a little something like this:

(Oh what do you want child?)
(Oh, what do I care?)
Mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy…

I think that last bit repeated a little longer, but you get the point. What’s funny is my sister and I both very clearly remember both the lyrics and the song.

Such exquisite talent. It’s a wonder we weren’t snapped up for well-deserved stardom and adulation. I tell you, the world is a poorer place for us having given up the dream so soon.



New Simon’s Cat video

I’ve been waffling back and forth about whether to post about the new video, which Simon uploaded a few days ago.

On the one hand, I like Simon. I like his videos and appreciate his dedication to the RSPCA and animal welfare. And I adore Simon’s Cat, in all his self-centered glory. But on the other hand, “Simon’s Sister’s Dog” falls flat for me:

1. It isn’t Simon’s Cat. We love the cat. The cat is why the videos have such a huge following. A dog really just doesn’t quite cut it.

2. The Simon’s Cat videos are funny. A bit dark sometimes but really funny. “Simon’s Sister’s Dog”  isn’t. And I doubt it was meant to be, given the subject.

3. “Simon’s Sister’s Dog” is preachy, something the Simon’s Cat videos never are. When people are jonesing for a another entertaining slice of Simon’s cat owner life, a visual slap on the wrist about overfeeding your dog isn’t quite what they were looking for. I appreciate the message but not the delivery.

The comments on the Youtube page are mostly positive, but after three days, the video has only had 120,643 views. Had it been a new cat video, I guarantee you that number would be a whole lot higher. I don’t see this one reaching the multi-million views that the other videos have.